same as it ever was, and the writing on the cards

Blah blah slept so late blah blah woke up with a headache, blah blah had so much to do, blah blah, didn’t accomplish anything at all, blah blah tired of it. Blah blah. I need a break from myself, is what I need. Can your consciousness take a vacation? I mean, legally. Though frankly, I have started to consider flipping through the phone book to see if it is listed under H, or if will I more properly find it under Dealers, Heroin. I need a break.

Things are not all ash, though. I’ve been doing the wardrobe remix thing, as threatened, and it has been, so far, incredibly fun. Already, the things I’ve noticed: I am excited to pick out an outfit, which means that I end up liking what I’m wearing, which means that I feel pretty, and confident, and good all day. I am getting used to looking at pictures of myself and not immediately, automatically zooming in on my flaws, my problems, my issues. It is nice to work at seeing myself objectively. And finally, every time I look at a photo of myself in my living room, I am reminded that I have really got to get my ready-to-assemble furniture ready and assembled and boxes unpacked and things put the hell away, because nobody lives like this. Nobody! Living like this!

Other happinesses–my flash fiction workshop
is over. Which is not the happy part, because I’ll miss it. But our
final assignment was to write a piece of flash fiction every day for a
week. I’ve decided to go ahead and try it every day for a month, and so
far it has been everything that is fun. My rules have been that I have
to write it within 15 minutes and it has to be 100 words exactly.
They will maybe be the seeds of larger stories, or they will just be
tiny stories I never do anything with except post on my journal and
enjoy having written. It is good, though, really good, I can’t even
tell you how good, to know that I can write something besides blog
entries. Though I still do love writing the blog entries.

And finally! I think I’ve responded to everyone awesome who wrote me to request a tiny story in the mail,
on a postcard. If you haven’t heard back from me, please poke me? And
if you have, you are on my list! I just need to find some postcards that are not postcards of the Mormon temple or mountains. You’d be
surprised at how difficult that turns out to be. Perhaps I will have
to simply write stories about the Mormon temple, or mountains. There
are worse writing prompts in the world.

In the meantime, I am
going to keep my head down and get two days worth of to-do lists
cleared out so that I can completely and thoroughly enjoy the first
weekend E. does not have to work, and not be filled with guilt and
anxiety and tiny little panics because there is so much undone. Blah blah, live in the moment, blah blah.

One Reply to “same as it ever was, and the writing on the cards”

  1. In my various driving pursuits around the DC metro area, there’s this HUGE Mormon temple that looks like Disney World meets Lord Sauron’s tower from Lord of the Rings. Apologies to any Mormons, but that’s what it looks like. I always find myself wondering “What were they thinking?” Mormon temples can offer a pretty huge scope for wild stories.

    (And it lights up at night.)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *