killing a man with your bare hands means never having to say you’re sorry

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One of the things I loved about watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer (besides the fact that it was awesome), was that it was a show about a teeny, tiny, sweet-faced little blonde girl who could kick your ever-loving ass. Buffy could walk down a dark alley in the deepest recesses of Danger Town, balancing a perfectly cooked medium-rare steak on one palm and a $100 bill on the other, and emerge out the other side…a little mussed, perhaps, and maybe without the steak, but that’s only because it got in the way when she was in the process of destroying all monsters. Girlfriend was tough, and strong, and quick, and girlfriend was safe.

That’s the real sticking point. She was safe. She could go anywhere, and do anything, and always feel absolutely secure and completely confident that she could smack anything down. It makes me wish I had Fists of Fury and Feet of Ferocity and big, bitey teeth that will give you rabies and maybe also a broadsword. Failing that, I could work toward becoming a martial artiste. And I will not go for cardio kickboxing, or karate (which I did as a child, and earned a yellow belt in, and has left me barely able to break a pencil). No, I will take up a deadly martial art, a martial art of doom. I will learn to kill an attacker with the crook of my pinky! I will be feared in criminal circles! I will have excellent cardiovascular health, and no fear.

  3 comments for “killing a man with your bare hands means never having to say you’re sorry

  1. Stephanie
    September 12, 2008 at 4:17 pm

    You might be interested in Krav Maga. It’s not necessarily a martial art so much as defensive and offensive tactics training, both with and without weapons. I love it!

  2. September 12, 2008 at 5:32 pm

    Yes! MT at number 5 – Wooo! ;)

    The great thing about Muay Thai in terms of its fitness benefits is that using your legs to that extent is extremely tiring, which is why Muay Thai fights are fought over 5 rounds whereas boxing is over 10.

    It’s the perfect martial art for me, and I can honestly say it’s changed my life :)

  3. September 14, 2008 at 11:10 am

    I do two arts. I do MT like Sarah for lots of reasons but the cardio and fitness aspect is one reason. And I also do a Filipino stick and knife fighting art so that I can learn how to use weapons and my environment to my advantage. Which is number 2, eskrima! Woo!

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